Living ~400lbs

… and believe me I am still alive

Not Doing Everything

Unvirtuous Abbey (“Digital monks praying for people with first world problems”) tweeted this week:

For those who have to carry the burden of what they see but are limited in what they can do, we pray.

That … says a lot, actually.

For many of us worldwide media means that we see much more than we can act upon.  So many causes.  So much suffering.  So much.  Toss in a 40+ hour-a-week-plus-commute job, a house, a parent needing care, and … it’s a bit more than I find easy to cope with.

Lately I’ve almost felt like I was drowning.

I’ve pulled back a bit, been online a bit less. This weekend I focused a family member’s birthday and some around-the-house tasks.   Tomorrow I go back to work.  I’m planning focus on getting to bed earlier this week and planning lunches instead of relying on beef jerky and dried fruit.  Wish me luck…

5 responses to “Not Doing Everything”

  1. Best of luck, and virtual hugs. I hope you are finding enough time to do things you enjoy, counteract the stressors and all that. xx

  2. I know others understand that I cannot do more in my life, but the worst one who doesn’t understan is my husband. He wants the housework done and the cooking done and the list goes on. He says he doesn’t see my disabilities, he sees me as the young healthy girl he married. I try. But I get so easily fatigued and after I am up for just three or four hours, I am ready to sleep again, totally worn out. I have to go very slowly, and don’t, admittedly, get much done. I am so glad someone understands.

  3. *wishing you luck really hard*

  4. Just do what you can. I am dealing with huge fatigue issues myself lately and have had them for years, some on and off basis. I am hugely overweight. Some days lately, I just want to lay in bed, I did the dishes today, made soup, and swept the kitchen floor, called people, took a shower, and feel like just laying down and reading when my mind is saying, “you need to take that trash out, you need to dust this place, you need to vacumn”, blah blah blah. Right now, I am telling self, you need to get mail and go take a walk and get some exercise, but I feel like I could fall asleep right here. I never have insomnia, when I go to bed, it’s like I pass out asleep from exhaustion.

    As for world’s causes, and rest, we all can just do what we can. America has been turned into the country of over-workers, I remember in 80s the Japanese were said to be over-workers, well for our employed people they have beaten the Japanese. I sometimes wonder what is all the message of constant “busy-ness” and rest doing to us all. We can only help ourselves and whoever God sends in our path. If you are holding down a full time job and overweight it’s tough. You probably are doing everything you can Kelly. Phyllis, your husband shouldn’t be so hard on you. I’ve been disabled for years, so mine had to get used to me even taking to my bed for a day except for necessities from illness or even being out the day before or being housebound long ago.

  5. What an incredibly sad study you posted.

    This line in particular really resonated with me: “The physical visibility of the fat body also means that this negative public gaze is inescapable for those who are classified as obese.”

    I’ve often cried to my mother because this is how I feel. I have health issues, which caused a sudden and dramatic weight gain of 30 lbs a few years back. I am classed as overweight now and I feel such shame and like such a failure because of this weight.

    I am also in recovery from an eating disorder and I know diets are not the answer. My ED experience taught me that. I wish I were brave enough to overcome society’s brainwashing, but I’m finding it very difficult

    Your blog is fantastic. Thank you for writing it.

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About Me

Former software tester, now retired heart patient having fun and working on building endurance and strength. See also About page.

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